- Lewis Wedlock
- 3 min read
This post was inspired by a few DM's I received across my social media channels asking if I had some straight-forward definitions for the the themes I explore online. This is TOTALLY fair considering that most of the terms I use are taken from my work in the academic sphere. So, this page will be added to when more definitions are requested, but for now, here are some terms you need to know when it comes to masculinity discourse you see online.
Patriarchy
A system where men hold most of the power in society—whether in politics, business, or at home—while women and people of other genders have less influence and fewer opportunities. It’s not about individual men being ‘bad,’ but about structures that benefit men as a group, often without them realizing it.
Heteropatriarchy
A version of patriarchy that not only prioritizes men but specifically privileges straight (heterosexual) men. It assumes that being straight is the ‘normal’ or ‘default’ way to be and marginalizes LGBTQ+ people in the process.
Coloniality
The ongoing impact of colonialism—even after empires ended. It’s the way ideas, systems, and power structures created during colonial rule still shape the world today—like racism, economic inequality, and whose knowledge or culture is seen as ‘superior.’
Hegemonic Masculinity
The version of masculinity that society presents as the ‘best’ or most ‘ideal.’ It’s typically about being tough, dominant, in control, emotionally closed-off, and heterosexual. Not all men fit this mold, but it sets the standard that many feel pressured to live up to.
"Red Pill" Masculinity
A (mostly) online movement that claims society is ‘lying’ to men, especially about gender and relationships. It pushes the idea that feminism has ‘weakened’ men and that to regain control, men need to be dominant, unemotional, and see women as either competition or something to ‘win.’ It’s named after the ‘red pill’ from The Matrix but is often used to justify misogyny.
"Healthy" Masculinity
A way of defining being a man that encourages men to be strong and kind, confident and emotional. It’s about breaking free from harmful stereotypes and embracing a fuller, more "balanced" version of masculinity.
"Toxic" Masculinity
A type feel pressured to always be aggressive, dominant, or emotionless because that’s what society tells them ‘being a man’ should look like. It’s not saying masculinity itself is bad, but that some extreme, unhealthy ideas about it can be harmful to both men and others.
Manosphere
A collection of online spaces where men discuss masculinity, dating, and gender issues—ranging from self-improvement to extreme misogyny. Some parts focus on fitness and confidence, but others promote harmful ideas about women, relationships, and power.
Misogyny
Hatred or deep disrespect toward women. This can show up as treating women as less important, making sexist jokes, or even violence. It’s rooted in the belief that men are superior to women.
Incel
Short for ‘involuntary celibate.’ A term used by some men online who are frustrated that they can’t get into romantic or sexual relationships. Some incels blame women for this and spread harmful, sometimes violent, ideas.
Femcel
Short for ‘female involuntary celibate.’ Similar to an incel, but for women who feel they can’t get into romantic or sexual relationships. However, femcel spaces online are usually less hateful and violent than incel spaces.
Looksmaxxing
An online trend where people (mostly men) try to improve their appearance as much as possible to become more attractive. It can be harmless (like fitness or skincare), but in some online spaces, it turns extreme, promoting surgery or unhealthy obsessions with looks.
Sexism
Unfair treatment or discrimination based on someone’s gender, usually against women and non-binary people. It can be obvious (like paying women less for the same job) or subtle (assuming women should be more emotional or nurturing).
VAWG (Violence Against Women and Girls)
A term used to describe different types of harm that women and girls experience because of their gender, including harassment, domestic abuse, and sexual violence.
Keep checking back for more definitions. This will be added to as more requests come in!
*It goes without saying that these are basic definitions; hopefully these can help you navigate some of the more complex discourse online in relation to masculinity!
For more information on my work with men, please click here.